Sunday was the most boring day of the week to us young children. I remember one Sunday in particular late August. The sun was shining and the blueberries they were ripe out back nan's house. My how I wanted to go pick some, but as you all know not allowed to pick berries on Sunday. Not allowed to do anything on Sundays. I begged my grandmother, well after she got sick of me she finally gave me a cup, and said " Now go pick some and then go out on the front step and eat em. And for God's sake don't let your grandfather know"
Well I got my berries and was sitting in the sun on the front step eating away. The door behind me was open. Inside the front door was the stairway to the second floor. All of a sudden my Grandfather was standing there right behind. "what are you doing?" he said. "Eating berries." was my reply. I thought I was going to be killed he knew now I had picked them. "Well," he said, " for God's sake don't let your grandmother know you picked them today"
And that was all that was ever said to me bout picking berries on Sunday
Anonymous
"Is that soup tinned?"
And the waitress replied ,"No, my dear, it's right t'ick!"
David Roche
Athens, Ohio
(formerly from Conception Bay South!)
1. You know more than you really want to concerning the personal lives of Rand, Lar and Deb.
2. You don't think that those poor souls setting up their campers in gravel pits are homeless.
3. You no longer go shopping, but hang around da mall instead.
4. You know that moose sometimes comes in a bottle, and caribou is the main ingredient in bologna.
5. You know that CBS is not just a cable channel.
6. Most parties you attend are either held in the kitchen or eventually end up there.
7. You've eaten cod tongues, and don't wonder what they did with the rest of the fish.
8. You are not surprised to see a bunch of tourists kiss a dead fish and shout: "Indeed I is, me old cock!"
9. When someone says they're going around the bay, you know that it's not just to the other side of the harbour.
10. You know that Here and Now is not just where you are at this moment.
11. At least once, you have endured the ferry ride from Port-aux-Basques to North Sydney by staying in the bar as long as possible, but then wish you had made more of an effort to find a comfortable chair to sleep in.
12. You know who Snook is, and have probably met someone just like him.
13. Seeing the word "Dildo" on a highway sign doesn't make you giggle and blush.
14. You aren't startled by large plywood moose with reflectors for eyes.
15. For some reason, you frequently replace the word "downtown" with the phrase "George Street".
16. You buy your bologna in sticks, and like it well done and `crispy' on the barbeque.
17. You know that the show you're watching is about to come back on because a music video is playing, and the letters N-T-V are somehow orbiting the earth.
18. You know that despite the vast distances between Canada and France, small boats carry booze and cigarettes between the two countries on a regular basis.
19. You know how to answer when somebody asks: "Whaddya at?"
20. You know that Jockey Club is not just an organization for little horse riders and India is not just a country in Asia.
21. You treat empty beer bottles with respect, and store them carefully for future visits to Brewer's Retail.
22. You're not surprised that all four comedians on This Hour has 22 Minutes are from Newfoundland, and know that the Quinlan Quints are not from Buchans.
23. You know that you couldn't possibly ask for any better place than Newfoundland, and anyone who doesn't think so just hasn't spent enough time here!
Brian Scott
Moncton, NB/Corner Brook, NF
During the Summer of 1994 I had the pleasure of working for minimum wage at a Subway in Corner Brook. I was working the graveyard shift one Tuesday night and around 1:30 am this guy staggers in, obviously three sheets to the wind after a rousing night at a local watering hole.
"Gimme a six foot assorted on white meat.", the gentleman ordered.
I assumed the gentleman wanted a six inch cold cut trio ® on white bread, so I proceeded to make the sandwich for him. He just looked on as I piled on the fixins, not bothering anyone.
Once I had finished making the sub and had it wrapped in paper, I asked the man, "Sir, would you like me to heat your sub?"
The gentleman's face took on a defensive and scared look and he replied hastily, "No b'y! I'n gonna h'eat it meself right 'ere!". :)
Gerry Mercer
St. John's/Mount Pearl/Corner Brook, NF